Augustine’s Contribution to Our Journey of Conversion in our Time
Introduction
Have you ever
thought: why is it that I repeat again and again the same sins? It doesn’t
matter what I do, I keep falling into my predominant sin! Well, you are not
alone. The road to conversion for some comes in an instant, but for the average
person, it is a lifelong, continuous journey. The journey of conversion
requires mentoring, perseverance, and God’s grace. We cannot achieve conversion
by ourselves. It requires accompaniment from people who have a bit of
experience in their journey of faith, our constant work towards becoming
better, and ultimately God’s constant help.
I want to
undertake a quest of understanding the road of conversion from what Augustine’s
experience, without a doubt, contributes to those who want to grow in their
unity with God. I want to part from the premise that many are interested in a
deeper connection with themselves and ultimately with God, they long for
conversion. However, they may have no models who may resonate with them, and
our dependance of Technology does not help the situation. With this said, I
want to try to give an understanding of Augustine’s conversion, which may help
us to make sense of our relationship with God and how our dependance of
technology may or may not aid us in this journey.
Conversion: Transformative
Models
Coaching is a term
that you can hear almost everywhere. You can hear it at work, in sports, in hospitals,
on social media, and even in church circles. Coaching is nothing new, it is as
old as humanity. As long as humanity has tried to pass on their acquired
knowledge to the next generation to prevent extinction, coaching has existed.
Of course, as with anything else, it has evolved and has become a more refined art. Just think of Saint Augustine: he hired
himself as a rhetoric coach “teacher”, and he was pretty good. Even though he
disliked the immaturity of some of his pupils, he enjoyed the art of teaching
rhetoric: “My heart was filled with hatred for these youths… Today I hate such
people for being depraved and twisted, but I love them insofar as they may be
corrected and may come to prefer the education to the money…”[1]
Coaching can be
either helpful or detrimental for student or apprentice alike. Coaching is
critical in every special aspect of life, as Kara Dennison mentions in her
article Why Leaders Should Consider Shifting to a Coaching Leadership Style
Now More Than Ever: “[Coaching is so critical] because it’s not just about
professional development, but about boosting your employee’s confidence and
building strong communication skills.”[2] The
need for models of life pushes us to search always for the best leaders
possible; however, having the best coach does not always ensure success. Look
at the journey of conversion of the disciples of Jesus: “Behold, we are going
to Jerusalem, and the Son of Man will be handed over to the chief priests and
scribes, and they will condemn him to death and hand him over to the Gentiles…
Then James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came to him and said to him, ‘Teacher,
we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.’”[3]
The disciples had the best coach, but it took time for them to understand their
own journey and to convert to the will of God. Even in the professional world,
the coherence between what is proposed and what is lived is essential: “I have
several personal experiences with coaches who preach these core values
(professionalism, collaboration, humanity, and equity) to others but don’t
follow them themselves. As part of the vetting, ask the prospective coach to
share specific examples of how they demonstrate each of these values.”[4]
Augustine found
coaches who were essential in his conversion journey because of their coherence
and simplicity of life. Among them, we encounter Monica, Ambrose, and his
friend Alypius. They were people who positively impacted Augustine and always enticed
him to reconsider his way of living.
a. Monica: Monica was a constant
character in the life of Augustine. She was deeply committed to Augustine, to
the point that she did not fear following Augustine to Milan. [5]
The difficulties of life did not deter her from trusting in God’s promises, and
with a greater effort, she prayed more to God with a grateful heart for
Augustine’s conversion when she saw a small progress. Monica was also an
example of the approach to life: she examined her custom rather than judging
immediately the issue at hand, promoted pious gatherings, and offered new ways
of understanding old traditions. [6]
b. Ambrose: Ambrose found enjoyment in Augustine’s
high respect. However, Augustine’s respect was due more to Ambrose’s
recognition by powerful people, and his simplicity of life. Augustine was
captivated and he continued to wonder about Ambrose’s way of living. Augustine
saw in him a well-rounded person who refreshed his body and mind, as well as
dedicated time to others and prayer. [7]
c. Alypius: Alypius, who became the bishop
of Thagaste around AD 394,[8] was
a long-lasting friend of Augustine. Both were fond of each other and shared
their experiences of life.[9] In
Alypius, Augustine saw someone who was not bent to the likening of others or
tried to fit in: “[A] rare soul which neither sought to make friends nor fear
to make an enemy.”[10]
Now, after we have
seen these people who were models for Augustine’s conversion let us turn our
eyes to a particular modern phenomenon: “The Influencers.” These role models,
presented for our younger generations, are creating an unrealistic reality that
is not helping people to find well-grounded role models to help them in
developing the best version of themselves: “If I follow influencers, in their
way of life, e.g. what clothes I wear, what I consume and how I live, while at
the same time trying to portray myself as unique, I can hardly concentrate on
my own wishes.” [11]
There is a sort of existential emptiness which does not help a person to either
know what to do or what he wants to do. He either chooses to conform or does
what others want him to do. [12]
Role models are
important on one’s conversion journey, though they may be not enough to help to
reach one’s full potential. The integration of life, either by habits, by a
principle, or by a changing experience,[13] aids
this process. For Augustine, the transformative experience comes in the form of
a riddle: “tolle, lege, tolle, lege ‘pick up and read, pick up and read.’” [14] [15]
As Augustine picks up the Word of God, he encounters peace, but not without the
help of his friend, Alypius, and the grace of God. [16]
Conversion: A
journey that requires time and work
Our journey of
conversion, besides the help of others, requires some elements which must be
integrated, namely, emotional, cognitive, physical, and spiritual. These
elements require time and commitment to develop healthily. Nevertheless, our
current reality doesn’t help much in the process of building up an integrated
humanity. We want immediate results, and whenever we are not able to see quick
results, we get anxious and lose hope. This erratic expectation doesn’t help us
to grow, and our problem is exacerbated by our technological world, which puts
at the tip of our fingers anything we want. This instant availability of things
gives us the perception that even our spiritual journey should be the same. In
a way, we are led to hopelessness when we see ourselves again and again in the
same behaviors.
Let us look at how
we transfer our dealings with virtual reality and online social networking,
since it touches the lives of everybody. Virtual reality and the time we spend on
our online networking communication, even though it helps much with our daily
work, it does not do much to help us to achieve an emotional integration, much
less our spiritual journey. It doesn’t help us to understand that the process
of conversion takes time and work. You may be asking yourself what social
networking and the use of social media has to do with perseverance, and more,
with spiritual life. Here, we have to part from the premise that habits build
over time. If we invest time and energy in good habits, we become better human
beings. However, if we spend our time and energy on bad habits, it will deter us
from having a well-balanced emotional life. “A habit is formed; when a habit is
not checked, it hardens into a compulsion.”[17] In
a way, the use of social media and modern means of communication is shaping the
way we journey with God. In many ways, what we do with social media impacts the
way we live, pray, and journey in life. We are constantly driven by checking
our feeds and interacting with others, but this interaction is rather ephemeral
and short-lived. This “mindlessly scrolling through social media feeds… it’s
not the best habit when it comes to our collective psychology,”[18] affirms
Alice Walton talking about the way that social media affects our mental health.
Therefore, the use
of online social networking has the potential to affect or greatly contribute
to our lives. However, it must be kept in check to take advantage of its
positive aspects. One of the less positive aspects of the use of online
networking is “instant gratification.” I am sure you have heard the saying:
“Patience is a virtue.” Well, in many ways instant gratification goes against
the patience we need to either cultivate a good habit or to get rid of a bad
one. Just think of today’s daily life. You can order something on Amazon in the
middle of the morning, and you are promised to get it before the end of the day.
Also, you are promised mighty speeds for our phones, so that you won’t miss a
notification or your favorite series. This constant stimulation prevents people
from building patience and learning to build good habits: “The need for round-the-clock
connection not only makes people more impatient, it also robs them of time for
quiet reflection or deeper, more critical thinking.”[19] [20]
The lack of
patience, time for quiet reflection, critical thinking, and time for prayer,
exacerbates the journey of conversion. For most of us, conversion entails a
life-long journey. It is a journey that requires
time, patience, self-nurturing, and a sprinkle of the grace of God. It must be
aided by a constant choice of God’s will. We cannot change our whole self in an instant,
rather, we must take time and invest in those habits, which in turn, will help
us to grow in union with God. Augustine found a great formula in his journey of
conversion: he found friends with whom he could share his thoughts and
experiences, he understood that it is necessary to refresh oneself (food and
exercise), and he also found out that it is necessary to dedicate time to
prayer.[21] [22]
Augustine finds
that only when we dedicate time to understand, to pray upon, and to try to
communicate to others our experience of faith, we are engaging in the process
of conversion.[23]
It is not a matter of making great advancements, but rather doing with
constancy what the Lord is calling us to do to balance out our lives, and to be
aware of our recurring sinfulness and struggles, without forgetting that God’s
Grace is in our journey.
Conversion: A
journey with the grace of God not by our merits
Time to process
emotions and thoughts is part of the process of conversion. We need to search
for what absorbs our time and energy. The awareness of what takes our attention
gives us an idea of what we need to focus on when we are working towards a
style of life and a change in our hearts. Once we have found what drives our
imagination, we must take specific steps toward what we want to achieve. We
must help God to help us in the process of our conversion:[24]
“Be a co-laborer with the gospel, according to the power of God, who saves and
calls us with His Holy calling – not according to our works but according to
his own design and the grace bestowed on us in Christ Jesus.”[25]
Augustine makes it
clear that God’s grace must be part of the equation when we are working toward
the rejection of temptation and sin. God’s intervention makes it possible for
us to avoid the occasion of sin. Jesus Himself prays for his disciples so that
they may be able to be faithful to God’s mission and will: “I do not ask that
you take them out of the world but that you keep them from the evil one.”[26]
God’s grace is indispensable for our conversion, we cannot change ourselves out
of sheer force of will.”[27]:
“Yet the determination of the human will is insufficient, unless the Lord grant
it victory in answer to prayer that it enter not into temptation.”[28]
God’s grace is indispensable, and God gives it to us freely.
Therefore, God’s
grace is a gift granted to us, not because of our merits, but because of the
graciousness of God: “Grace, therefore, is from the One who calls, the good
works that result are from the one who receives that grace. These good works do
not produce grace; they are produced by grace.”[29] It
is only when we acknowledge, with humility, that everything we have comes from
God,[30]
that we understand that it is not because of our doings that we obtain grace,
but by believing that God’s grace is in us, and grace will help us to produce
good works: “I have obtained mercy that I might be faithful.”[31]
Consequently, we
ought to collaborate with God in our journey of conversion. Trusting that God
is leading us to a fuller life even though we would like to have it right here
and right now. Knowing our strengths and our weakness will enable us to
collaborate more deeply with God’s grace.[32] As
Augustine says: “I believe it to be pleasing in your sight that I should
withdraw the service of my tongue from the market of speechifying, so that
young boys who were devoting their thoughts not to your law, not to your peace…
should no longer buy from my mouth the weapons for their frenzy.”[33]
He was good in rhetoric, and what he was doing was good. However, as he is
journeying towards a deeper union with God, he recognizes that, even though his
gift is good, his gift may not be helpful for him and others.[34]
This realization sets him on the way to change a habit, not without pain, but
knowing that it was for the best for him and those around him.
Moreover, when we understand
that God is walking with us and aiding us to grow in his life, we then desire
more to grow in his life and will. It gives us the desire to not be separated
from him and to do everything we do because we find ourselves loved by God.[35] I
guess that a prayer, which is attributed to Saint Teresa of Avila, but which no
one is certain the origin of it, can summarize the firing passion that someone
can get from understanding God’s love: “In
the end, what moves me is your love; and in such a manner that even if there’d been no
heaven, I’d’ve loved you, and even if
there’d been no hell, I’d’ve feared you. You
do not have to give to me, because I would love you. Then, even if I’d not have hoped how much I hope,
I’d’ve desired you the same that I desire you.”[36] Augustine
would agree when he says: “On your exceedingly great mercy rests all my hope.
Give what you command, and then command whatever you will.”[37]
Conclusions
As modern people,
we want answers, and we look for fast changes. However, when it comes to
developing our humanity and spiritual life, we realize that changes don’t come
as fast as we would like them to come. Therefore, we are called to journey with
our eyes open, with perseverance, and with God’s Grace.
In conclusion, we
must understand that conversion requires learning about God’s will, either by
reading, listening to other stories of life, or seeing the transformative
presence of God in others. We also need to cooperate with God and be constant,
even though we do not understand the way. Finally, we must understand that we
receive God’s grace freely, and when we are moved to look for what pleases God,
we become more sensitive to our sinfulness. Also, we must become more sensitive
to His grace. We must actively get in touch with God, look for what we want Him
to help us with, do our part, and pray for those things we cannot do without
His help. Lastly, if we frequently keep in mind the life of St Augustine, and
his process of conversion, the steps we take in our own conversion may prove to
be more beneficial to us.
Consulted Material
1.
Augustine of Hippo. 2012. The Confessions: Saint Augustine of Hippo. Edited
by David Vincent Meconi. Translated by Maria Boulding. San Francisco,
CA: Ignatius Press.
2.
Harmless, William (ed.) 2010. Augustine In
His Own Words. Washington, D.C.: The Catholic University of America Press.
3.
Viktor
Frankl. 1991. El Hombre en Busca de Sentido. Barcelona: Editorial
Herder.
4.
Augustine, On Grace and Free Will, II,
VXVI, 7. Accessed November 19, 2022.
https://www.newadvent.org/fathers/1510.htm
5.
Kara Dennison. 2021, “Leadership
Strategy.” Why Leaders Should Consider Shifting to a Coaching Leadership
Style Now More Than Ever. Accessed November 6, 2022.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/karadennison/2021/09/20/why-leaders-should-consider-shifting-to-a-coaching-leadership-style-now-more-than-ever/?sh=7fe6c5b02f81
6.
Forbes. “Expert Panel.” Council Post. Accessed
November 6, 2022. https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2022/01/21/looking-for-a-coach-14-examples-of-bad-coaching-to-look-out-for/?sh=68e0f46e3766
7.
Midwest Augustinians. “Saint Alypius.” Accessed
November 12, 2022. https://www.midwestaugustinians.org/st-alypius
8.
Elisa Miebach. 2019. “Science” Why Our Brains
Loves Instagram. Accessed November 6, 2022. https://www.dw.com/en/instant-gratification-and-the-pursuit-of-perfection-why-our-brains-love-instagram/a-50039609
9.
Benedict XVI. 2008. General Audience. Vatican Web
page. Accessed November 7, 2022. https://www.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/audiences/2008/documents/hf_ben-xvi_aud_20080227.html
10.
Alice G. Walton. 2017. “Healthcare.” 6 Ways
Social Media Affects Our mental Health. Accessed November 7, 2022. https://www.forbes.com/sites/alicegwalton/2017/06/30/a-run-down-of-social-medias-effects-on-our-mental-health/?sh=4ba18dc42e5a
11.
Ronald Alsop. 2014. “News.” Instant
Gratification & Its Dark Side. Accessed November 12, 2022. https://www.bucknell.edu/news/instant-gratification-its-dark-side
12.
Igor Pantic, 2014. “Cyberpsychology, Behavior
and Social Networking.” Online Social Networking and Mental Health. Accessed
November 12, 2022. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4183915/
13.
Aliens in This World. “No Me Mueve Mi Dios.”
Accessed November 21, 2022. https://suburbanbanshee.wordpress.com/2012/01/23/no-me-mueve-mi-dios/
14.
USCCB. “Books of the
Bible.” Accessed November 20, 2022. https://bible.usccb.org/bible/
15.
Merton, Thomas. 1961. The New Man. New York:
Mentor-Omega Books.
[1]
Augustine, Confessions, V.XII.22
[2]
Kara Dennison. 2021, “Leadership Strategy.” Why Leaders Should Consider
Shifting to a Coaching Leadership Style Now More Than Ever. Accessed
November 6, 2022,
https://www.forbes.com/sites/karadennison/2021/09/20/why-leaders-should-consider-shifting-to-a-coaching-leadership-style-now-more-than-ever/?sh=7fe6c5b02f81
[3]
Mark 10:33; 35.
[4] Forbes.
“Expert Panel.” Council Post. Accessed November 6, 2022. https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2022/01/21/looking-for-a-coach-14-examples-of-bad-coaching-to-look-out-for/?sh=68e0f46e3766
[5]
Augustine, Confessions VI, I, 1
[6]
Augustine, Confessions VI, II, 2
[7]
Augustine, Confessions VI, III, 3-4
[8] Midwest
Augustinians. “Saint Alypius.” Accessed November 12, 2022. https://www.midwestaugustinians.org/st-alypius
[9]
Augustine, Confessions, VI, VI, 6
[10]
Augustine, Confessions, VI, IX, 9
[11] Elisa
Miebach. 2019. “Science” Why Our Brains Loves Instagram. Accessed
November 6, 2022. https://www.dw.com/en/instant-gratification-and-the-pursuit-of-perfection-why-our-brains-love-instagram/a-50039609
[12] Frankl, El Hombre en Busca
de Sentido, pg. 108. “El hombre ha sufrido otra pérdida: las tradiciones
que habían servido de contrafuerte a su conducta se están diluyendo a pasos
agigantados. Carece, pues, de un instinto que le diga lo que ha de hacer, y no
tiene ya tradiciones que le indiquen lo que debe hacer; en ocasiones no sabe ni
siquiera lo que le gustaría hacer. En su lugar, desea hacer lo que otras
personas hacen (conformismo) o hace lo que otras personas quieren que haga
(totalitarismo).”
[13] Frankl, El Hombre en Busca
de Sentido, pg. 112. “Ya hemos dicho que el sentido de la vida siempre está
cambiando, pero nunca cesa. De acuerdo con la logoterapia, podemos descubrir
este sentido de la vida de tres modos distintos: (1) realizando una acción; (2)
teniendo algún principio; y (3) por el sufrimiento. En el primer caso el medio
para el logro o cumplimiento.”
[14]
Benedict XVI. 2008. General Audience. Vatican Web page. Accessed November 7,
2022. https://www.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/audiences/2008/documents/hf_ben-xvi_aud_20080227.html
[15]
Augustine, Confessions VIII, 12, 29
[16]
Augustine, Confessions, VIII, 12, 19
[17]
Augustine, Confessions, VII, V, 10
[18] Alice
G. Walton. 2017. “Healthcare.” 6 Ways Social Media Affects Our mental Health.
Accessed November 7, 2022. https://www.forbes.com/sites/alicegwalton/2017/06/30/a-run-down-of-social-medias-effects-on-our-mental-health/?sh=4ba18dc42e5a
[19] Ronald
Alsop. 2014. “News.” Instant Gratification & Its Dark Side. Accessed
November 12, 2022. https://www.bucknell.edu/news/instant-gratification-its-dark-side
[20] Igor Pantic, 2014. “Cyberpsychology,
Behavior and Social Networking.” Online Social Networking and Mental Health.
Accessed November 12, 2022. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4183915/
[21]
Harmless, Augustine in his own words, pg.406
[22]
Mark 6:31
[23] Benedict
XVI. 2008. General Audience. Vatican Web page. Accessed November 20, 2022. https://www.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/audiences/2008/documents/hf_ben-xvi_aud_20080227.html
[24]
Augustine, On Grace and Free Will, II, VXVI, 7. Accessed November 19,
2022. https://www.newadvent.org/fathers/1510.htm
[25]
Augustine, On Grace and Free Will, II, VXVI, 12
[26]
John 17:15
[27]
Harmless, Augustine in his own words, pg.406
[28]
Augustine, On Grace and Free Will, II, VXVI, 9
[29]
Harmless, Augustine in his own words, pg.385-386
[30]
Thomas Merton, The New Man, Pg. 64
[31] Augustine,
On Grace and Free Will, II, VXVI, 17
[32]
Harmless, Augustine in his own words, pg.395
[33]
Augustine, Confessions, IX, II, 2
[34] Benedict
XVI. 2008. General Audience. Vatican Web page. Accessed November 22, 2022. https://www.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/audiences/2008/documents/hf_ben-xvi_aud_20080227.html
[35] Viktor Frankl, El Hombre en Busca
de Sentido, Pg. 102-103
[36] Aliens
in This World. “No Me Mueve Mi
Dios.” Accessed November 21, 2022. https://suburbanbanshee.wordpress.com/2012/01/23/no-me-mueve-mi-dios/
[37]
Augustine, Confessions, X, XXIX, 40
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